Leap Year

It's a leap year, and today is the date that only exists sometimes. So I am posting this just for the date that will be attached to it. Yep, getting "Feb 29th" attached to this post is the only reason I am writing today.

So anyway, if today is your birthday- then happy birthday! Celebrate with four years worth of party-power! Hmm, that should be a helluva party... can I come?  ;)

Election Year Politics

Election year politics drives me nuts. I am continuously baffled at the notion of human beings amending their identity so thoroughly as to doggedly adopt the stance of any one political party. The logical approach would seem to suggest that both sides of a two party system are going to have some valid points. Neither side is ever going to have a monopoly on reason, or virtue.

This strange behavior seems to manifest itself most noticeably through the adamant assertion that everything the [insert your party here] candidate has ever done is beyond reproach, and everything that the [insert opposing party here] candidate has ever done must (of course) be deplorable and treacherous.

Further more: if the incumbent is a [insert opposing party here], your top priority is to blame any and all existing problems on the current administration, regardless of the scope, prerequisite causal factors, or length of history relating to said problems. Linking current issues to their full context and factual track record, is just a distraction tactic... right?

The eternally adversarial nature of a two party system is, at the end of the day, a total joke and I for one am sick of it. Look at all the asinine blocking, finger-pointing, and subversive party-wide campaigning happening on capitol hill right now. Our elected "representatives" are essentially throwing up a collective middle-finger to the people of America, whom they are sworn to serve. While the citizens of this nation continue living in a society bereft of adequate upkeep, both sides of the aisle are getting next to nothing done for us, because (of course) it's an election year. Apparently "election year" means all elected representatives get to take a 12-month paid vacation, punctuated periodically by strategic mud-slinging sessions.

What ever happened to plain and simple patriotism? ONE nation under God, indivisible... INDIVISIBLE?! The politics are utterly and absolutely out of control in America, and it is high time we wake the hell up and realize it. It's really starting to feel like the only thing lacking to make this a genuine civil war are the guns! Quit being party-driven robots, people ...the system is broken. No amount of blind cheering for either side of the aisle is going to solve anything.

So anyway... calm down, quit campaigning for a minute, and go read the constitution. I'm not kidding, go read it- it's a lot shorter than that Harry Potter novel you've been meaning to finish. And hey, if you pay attention- you just might get a whiff of what true patriotism, a genuine desire for freedom, and a real commitment to equality... smells like.

I won't try to put into words what capitol hill smells like right now.

We Adapt To Survive

Cal Lightman: I'm sorry about before. (Ria raises her eyebrows at him) Sometimes I see so much, I don't know how not to tell people.

Ria Torres: Yeah, I get that.

Cal Lightman: You're right; most people don't change. Right? I've been there, waiting for it, hoping for it, and then they just... don't. But there are a few, I think, who can.

Ria Torres: Any other life lessons?

Cal Lightman: (leans forward in his chair) When someone... bashes you around, who's twice your size, just whenever he feels like it, you learn to read emotions pretty fast. We adapt to survive. Your abuse made you a natural. He made you what you are.

Ria Torres: Well, I'll be sure to thank him.

(Cal laughs and sits back in his chair)

Ria Torres: So what about you?

Cal Lightman: Nah, I'm not a natural. I had to learn this.

Ria Torres: Why did you want to learn? What, you all of a sudden became obsessed with facial expressions? (she reads his face) I didn't think so. So who was it? Who made you who you are?

[ Lie to Me, Season 1: Episode 5, "Unchained" ]

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Much like the character of Ria Torres in my favorite TV show "Lie to Me", I have a hobby that I did not consciously choose for myself, at least not originally. I am naturally fascinated with human behavior, particularly the art of being able to make reliable observations of the way people tend to act in a given situation. The goal being to predict a person's behavior accurately enough to be able to identify and avoid unwanted confrontation, emotional distress, or even physical danger.

This is not a joke or an exaggeration, I grew up in an emotionally and mentally abusive home. I learned at an early age, that avoiding my Father's unpredictable bursts of anger was very important. If I could see my Dad's mood swings coming soon enough, I could save myself the emotional, mental, and sometimes physical pain that would inevitably follow. I did not fully realize the gravity of those experiences, until becoming a father myself.

Even as a grown man in my thirties, I still live life based on the survival skills I learned as a child. I have a natural inclination to observe human tendencies under a given set of circumstances, mentally plot the relationships between those pieces of data, and then attempt to recognize the onset of those behaviors before they happen again. Given adequate observational data, I have accurately predicted what a person is going to say or do next, more times than I can count. I have "read" people from all walks of life, in many different settings- home, church, school, and even business. And in case you are wondering- no, this skill is not always incredibly useful in personal relationships which you value.

Now you may say: "anyone can make simple predictions if they have enough data", and I would agree that that is a reasonable amount of skepticism. But this begs the question, where does a person get their hands on that information in the first place? Due to the highly subjective nature of this type of information (and most importantly- the intended application of it), the individual would need to gather the majority of this data through first-hand observation and personal experience. You would have to know what kind of data is going to be useful in this application in the first place, and know how to gather it reliably.

Then you must know how to process and organize your observations in meaningful ways, and sift out as many false-positives as possible. And finally, even if a person manages to consistently (and yes I mean consistently) gather and process enough data to facilitate an informed hypothesis, you still need to know what to actually DO with it when the time comes. In other words: all the data in the world would be useless in the hands of an individual who has an insufficient understanding of how to apply that knowledge in a real-life situation. This is where being a "natural" comes in. Being a "natural" means you innately know how to do all of the above, and do it in a useful way.

Human beings are creatures of habit, prone to conditioned responses, and therefore rather predictable. However, we are also prideful, sensitive beings. Nobody likes being told what they are going to do next, even if that prediction is 100% correct. We want to feel like we are in control of our own lives. The mere suggestion that some other entity knows what we are going to do- before we actually do it, offends our sense of free will. The human psyche is rather susceptible to being obstinate and contrary- so telling a person that they are predestined to a certain course of action, will most likely taint the result. People will alter their behavior, just to disprove a prediction.

So anyway, I want to spend some more time on the practical application of these principles in a follow-up article, but for now I wanted to post this much and maybe even spark some interesting discussion on the subject.

A Step Forward

So far in my infrequent and disjointed blogging, I have generally tried to leave specific personal details out of my writing. I originally decided to do things that way in order to maintain a certain amount of privacy while still being able to post my writing in public view for anyone to read.

However, due to the cumulative effect of some recent events, I have decided that I want to take a step forward in what I write about, and how I write it. Therefore, I will be attempting to write more frequently, and more openly from now on.

I am choosing to make this change in the way I blog partly due to a challenge issued last weekend in a global address given by one of the leaders of my church. The challenge was to not be afraid to stand up and be who we really are, to not be afraid of sharing our beliefs about the important truths we hold dear in life. To embrace our most important values in life, and share them freely with anyone who will listen.

So not that anyone actually reads my blog (admittedly there hasn't been much here to read), but here goes:  My name is Chuck. I am in my mid thirties. I have a family. I am a Christian, and I hate politics but can't resist a good political discussion. I love food, I'm a sucker for those travel shows on PBS, and yet I am often found playing video games and bobbing my head to some good dubstep, or some Chopin depending on the day.

So anyway, none of that information really changes anything, but it's a start.  :)

Music Is The Universal Language

My soul resonates to the sound of a piano, the beat of a drum, the guitar that you strum, the gentle shaping of melodic airwaves as they escape the vocal chords.

Music stimulates the mind, and lights a fire in the heart.

So anyway... I love music!

Being Different

Settle for ordinary?  Never.

Why?  Because the pursuit of greatness is its own reward.

Sometimes we need to pause and remind ourselves why we are who we are, and that's ok.  Life is crazy, it's easy to get distracted.  Perhaps you are different from most people-- you don't automatically "buy in" to what everyone else is doing... something inside you believes there is more to life than being a number.  You want to be different, you want to matter.

Being different can be a lonely road.  The desire that prompts us to be more than what life hands us can leave us frustrated at times.  Don't let it get you down.  If you choose to be a rock that stands out in the riverbed, don't let the the eroding currents of social pressure discourage you.  The stone that stands against the stream can become polished and beautiful. Still, a little healthy perspective can go a long way in helping you continue being who you want to be.  Especially if what makes you happy is something that frequently leaves you exhausted, wondering if you are crazy for wanting what you want. So what can we do to recharge our batteries?

Look for beauty in simple things.

You are art.  Don't roll your eyes, it's true.  Everything you do is an exhibition of the most amazing work of art in the world: the human soul.  Everything you do is slowly but surely creating something bigger, something that matters.  The Grand Canyon was created one tiny step at a time, over a period of millions of years.  Every day your life adds up into the incredible collective that we lovingly refer to as a magnificent human being.

Greatness does not happen in 120 minutes, unlike the exciting movies that we watch.  Greatness is not a destination, is it a state of mind that takes us on a journey, and that journey is what makes life wonderful.  So if you want to think great thoughts... slow down and let it happen, one thought at a time. If you want to do great things, pay attention each day for opportunities to do something good that you could have just as easily ignored. Keep doing that every day and you will wake up one day and realize your life is actually different than it was the year before.  I use this principle in my own life to create positive change, and I can tell you it is truly a life-saver.

EVERYTHING starts with choice.  You can choose to be a little more honest today than you were yesterday.  You can choose to be a little more humble today.  If someone tells you that they did not like something you did, maybe you really weren't as considerate as you could have been.  You can choose to be objective.  By definition, being truly objective is pretty much impossible- but the act of genuinely trying to see the big picture, can stretch us like an overzealous yoga teacher.  (It doesn't sound like it, but that's a good thing!)

It doesn't matter if you are "good" at choosing to be better each day, just keep focusing on the fact that you DO have a choice in the matter. That is the most important part, because change has to start inside you.  Choice is the most powerful catalyst in the universe, yet we take it for granted constantly!  It was a human choice to research splitting atoms.  It was a human choice to use the knowledge gained from that research to build a weapon.  It was a human choice to put that weapon on a plane and erase an entire city of people off the face of the Earth. Then it was a human choice to do it more than once. The ability to choose is clearly the single most god-like power we possess as human beings, which can be exercised to positive or negative effect.

So anyway... don't pressure yourself about things that inherently take time, that is why new year resolutions fail.  Learn to see the beauty in simple things.  Celebrate the art of being yourself.  Be patient, enjoy the journey for the valuable experience that it is.  Respect your power to choose, use it to do something good every day.  Don't let it get you down if being different from the masses is lonely or frustrating, remember: the pursuit of greatness is its own reward!